Things you didn’t know about The Internet: I’m A Teapot

I’ve been using the internet since before you knew it existed. Hell, I was using it before it was an internet! I was bouncing email messages off JANET relays before you were….whatever, you get the idea. Because of this, I know how it works…I know things about the internet you will never know… For example,… Read More »

Brexit or Remain – Take it…or leave it?

I chose neither side in the Remain / Brexit debate. I did not vote. This is not an argument for or against either side. In a discussion earlier, I heard again about how “The older people who voted for Brexit have destroyed the future for the younger generations”. I disagree and this is why: In… Read More »

This Joke Is Not Allowed On Facebook

If this joke is not allowed on Facebook, how has it been there since the 26th January 2016 (a month from this posting date!) with 6788 shares, 978 likes & 57 comments? I wonder if it is in fact allowed on Facebook, but is such a poor attempt at humour that the author had to… Read More »

Today Is National Nurses Day

Unless today is May 6th and you are in the United States then today is NOT National Nurses Day and this is Bollocks! Source: http://www.timeanddate.com/holidays/us/national-nurses-day However, if today is May 12th then it may well be International Nurses Day! Source: Wikipedia – International Nurses Day Probably a good idea to use the international version on a global… Read More »

Remove Hammer To Break Glass In Emergency

So….I “Break Glass To Access Hammer”….to “Remove Hammer to Break Glass”. I break the glass to get the hammer to break the glass that I already had to break to get the hammer to break the glass? This seems a bit confusing although someone has clearly managed it…so it looks like bollocks but maybe this… Read More »

Confused

Those that know me, know that I have many friends. Imaginary friends. They are actually real people but I imagine that are my friends. Contrary to popular belief though, I do actually have a mate, his name is MoFo. When I woke this morning I had 2 voicemail messages from him: Voicemail number 1: “Nunchukas!”… Read More »

World Earth Day

Good news everyone! Some condescending hippies have decided to tell us what to do again. All for our own good of course… The plan this time is for everyone to turn their lights off between 8pm and 9pm. This will, apparently, save lots of energy. It is, of course, a monumentally stupid idea of the… Read More »

Tuchuk Is A Time Waster

[Note: See the Cold Callers page for an explanation of what these posts are all about.] WT: Wolf Tuchuk CC: Cold Caller I just got off the ‘phone and I have a big grin on my face. Why? I shall tell you: 10 minutes ago, the ‘phone rang with yet another cheery call from a… Read More »

Tied Up?

[Note: See the Cold Callers page for an explanation of what these posts are all about.] WT: Wolf Tuchuk CC: Cold Caller Obligatory pause while computer connects me to a salesman which, conveniently, gives me due warning to have some fun. WT: “Hello” CC: “Hello, Is Mrs Tuchuk in?” WT: “She’s tied up at the… Read More »

Correct Distance?

I spotted these signs and was so bemused that the next time I passed by, I stopped and photographed them. Here are the two signs, one on each side of the road, right opposite each other (apologies for the bad focus): Can’t see too much eh? I’ll zoom in on each sign for you: Now… Read More »